Growing up, we had a penny jar. It was actually a huge beer bottle that our family used to save all our coins. Once a year right before Christmas, we would dump it all out onto the table and roll the coins into the paper sleeve and bring it to the bank. I actually looked forward to it. I always tried to guess how much money was in that bottle. It taught me to count money and made me realize how much a dollar was worth. I think it was used for Christmas presents which were always exciting.
I also remember growing up and my mom would hide money around the house. She would hide it under the ironing board cover. She would hide it in the cabinets between plates we did not use very often. She would hide it in an old cookie jar above the cabinets that was used for decoration. I remember going around the house when she wasn’t home trying to find the money. I wouldn’t take all of it but I would take enough to go buy me something fun. She never suspected that I was taking her money, she never questioned me anyway I always wondered how she kept track of it. I asked her recently why she did this, and she said because her mother did it. Her mother grew up in the Great Depression and had to save every penny. She also didn’t trust my grandfather with money because he would drink it away. I don’t think my mom trusted my dad with the money either. My dad enjoyed spending everything that came in.
It’s funny when we can look back and remember how we were brought up to think about money and see how it plays out in our lives today. I used to be really tight with my money and had to justify every purchase I made on myself. I remember being worried if I could afford something at Walmart, because I never knew how much money I actually had. It wasn’t until my husband got us on a budget that we allocated certain amounts of money for different things. I remember fighting and screaming when we would try to balance our account, probably because I was scared to find out the truth about where our money was going. But after 30 years of marriage, we have learned to not take these things personally. I have learned to trust that we will always have enough money for what we need and have an open conversation communication about how to spend on large purchases. I’ve never had to ask for money being a stay-at-home mom knowing I wasn't bringing in any income to contribute to the family. And we have played around with giving ourselves allowances which is just spending money that we don’t need to justify or claim.
The Enneagram has been a great tool to help me understand my money mindset and given me insight into where I get caught in the old mindset of scarcity and how to move toward a generous and open mindset.
Take a look at your Enneagram type to see if this rings true for you.
Type 1 (The Perfectionist): Type 1 individuals often have a responsible and conscientious approach to money. They may be diligent savers, budgeters, and strive for financial stability. They might feel guilty about spending on non-essential items and may focus on ensuring their finances are in order.
Type 2 (The Helper): Type 2 individuals tend to be generous and giving. They may prioritize using their money to help others or contribute to causes they care about. They might struggle with setting boundaries when it comes to money and prioritize the needs of others over their own financial well-being.
Type 3 (The Achiever): Type 3 individuals are often driven by success and recognition. They may place importance on financial status and material achievements. They might be motivated to earn money to maintain a certain image or to prove their success to themselves and others.
Type 4 (The Individualist): Type 4 individuals often have a unique and individualistic approach to money. They may value experiences and personal expression over material possessions. They might focus less on financial stability and more on pursuing their passions, sometimes leading to financial instability.
Type 5 (The Investigator): Type 5 individuals are typically independent and self-reliant. They may approach money with caution and frugality, valuing financial security and autonomy. They might be more inclined to save and invest their resources, ensuring they have enough for their needs.
Type 6 (The Loyalist): Type 6 individuals often seek security and stability. They may be cautious with money, preferring to have a safety net or emergency fund. They might be risk-averse and strive to avoid financial uncertainty.
Type 7 (The Enthusiast): Type 7 individuals often seek pleasure, novelty, and new experiences. They may have a more impulsive approach to money, enjoying spending on things that bring them joy. They might struggle with long-term financial planning and prefer instant gratification.
Type 8 (The Challenger): Type 8 individuals tend to be assertive and confident. They may view money as a tool for power and control. They might be comfortable taking risks in financial endeavors and have a desire for financial independence.
Type 9 (The Peacemaker): Type 9 individuals often value peace and harmony. They may have a more relaxed and laid-back approach to money, sometimes avoiding financial conflicts or decision-making. They might prioritize stability and maintaining a sense of balance in their financial life.
When I work with clients, money always comes up. I have helped them gain a new perspective on their beliefs around money and how to make adjustments to have a more healthy outlook on their finances.
If this is something you would like to talk about, I would love to come alongside you and help you gain a new perspective around money.