Updated: Nov 6
Back in the day, I was a makeup artist. I worked at a department store for a major cosmetic brand for over five years. I loved making women look and feel pretty. I would teach them how to apply just the right eye shadow in just the right places. I even had a side hustle of doing weddings. It was exciting to be a part of a bride's special day by pampering her and her bridesmaids with that little extra sparkle. One thing I learned while working with these expensive department store brands was, that the drug store brands were comparable and so much cheaper. Some of them were even made by the same companies. Would I tell my customers this? No. I worked on commission and needed the money. But something deep inside felt like I was lying. I struggled to up-sell and cringed when someone would dish out $200 for a miracle cream. I knew all too well that they could get the same potion in a bottle for a fraction of the cost at the local drug store. Even though I worked for this brand and received free products, I still preferred my $4.99 mascara and found colors for my lips that matched just right on the cheap.
There seems to be a trend lately of #TikToks of cosmetic influencers comparing the expensive brands to "dupes" you can find at the dollar store. Honestly, I go and find out for myself that what their review says is true. I don't mind spending a few bucks to save a lot. Most of them are pretty accurate but some I've had to return and get my money back. And I'm ok with that. I would rather figure out for myself what works and what doesn't for me. I don't have to depend on someone else's opinion to see if something is right or true for me. I can try it on, test it out, and trust my gut to determine if something is right for me or not.
You can too. And I'm not just talking about make-up. You can determine what your truth is. You have been given such a wonderful mind and intuition to discern what is right or wrong, truth or a lie, good or bad. Other people's opinions and perspectives can be helpful and give some direction but having the confidence to trust yourself is all you need to make wise decisions. So, how can you tell if you are being #duped?
Pay attention to what your body is telling you. Do you get chills or goosebumps when something doesn't feel right? Do you get a pit in your stomach after making a big move? Do your shoulders tense up and you get a headache before doing something you aren't sure you should?
Pay attention to your thoughts. Are you creating a story of "worst-case scenario"? Do you have all the information you need to make the decision or determine if the decision is right for you? Do you have thoughts of regret, guilt, or shame?
Pay attention to your emotions. Do you have a sense of peace or is their anger and resentment in what you are believing? Are you feeling confused or scared about how people are interacting with you? Are you left questioning people's motives because they don't follow through or their walk doesn't match their talk? Let this feelings wheel help you identify, acknowledge and accept your emotions.
Self-awareness is the first and most important thing to have in place when it comes to detecting deceit. When you can tune in to your mind, body, and emotions, you will know if you are believing the truth or being manipulated. Start with getting to understand yourself better with the free Enneagram test. Then let's talk. I want you to know the truth and be set free from being duped.